Entries by Craig

I've been out of pocket for a while here, cooking up some things involving BED BUGS. It's totally crazy how out of control the issue seems to be. But before I get into that...

Okay, I’ve been angry at Tenants before. I admit it. I’m human. And there’s never a time more typical for a Landlord/Tenant relationship to bubble-over with vitriol then right at the moment where it all ends, and it’s time to settle up. That’s when all the building irritation comes to light, and my, oh my is it unpleasant to look at.

I’ve never been so angry as to pursue any of my Tenants after the end of their lease, to date, as I’ve done my best to maintain a pleasant relationship with them through the course of our business together. But that doesn’t mean that everyone else has such healthy contractual relationships.

Gone Feral’s ex-Landlord is speculated to have gone to some rather creepy extremes to express their displeasure at some of the Feral’s previous slights. Something about their cat, the male half of the Landlord-set, and some sort of stay in a medical facility. Sounds pretty messed up. But then things apparently spiraled further out of control, involving harassing emails, and perhaps even the dispatching of a computer virus. Intrigue indeed!

Speaking of intrigue, what the hell is up with Detroit? Is that economy ever going to pick up in any measurable way? Will Ford ever matter again? At least one decent Landlord there made an effort to be kind to the Breakfast at Gigi’s couple, who were renting in some neighborhood plagued by crackheads and car theft. They requested that they be able to break their lease early to avoid certain tragedy, and the Landlord not only granted their wish without charging a break-lease fee, but even transferred their deposit to another of his properties in another, decidedly safer part of town.

It is a shame that their car didn’t make it out, though.

It appears that Bedbugs are quite the rage, still, in and amongst the ranks of both Landlords and Tenants. In many ways, and for many reasons, I wanted this to be a temporary scare. My wants are not being met by the bugs.

If you’re wondering whether or not your Tenants might have a problem and simply aren’t talking to you about it, try and understand that many Tenants feel that admitting to bedbugs is the same as admitting to living in neglectful filth (which is NOT necessarily the case). This causes an understandable amount of shyness in getting the problem remedied early enough to avoid a full-blown infestation. I recommend printing or emailing the link for this site: Bedbugger. They have an awesome FAQ and a “tales of woe" post to help anyone feeling alone with the bugs. The University of Kentucky Entomology also has a fantastic write up on the bugs (complete with helpful pictures of infestation evidence).

Not convinced that bedbugs are a serious issue for Landlords? Well…

Bugged Out reflects on the perils of 2006, and the bedbugs it brought. The Bedbug Blog brings you photos of their handiwork. And while his war was waged and potentially won earlier in 2006, Bed Bug War’s chronicles are still worth a read since he was at the forefront of a building war.

In my recent research, I came across a humorous take on these blood suckers: The Frankenstein Bug. Funny, good times in the face of the merciless Bed Bug. It’s a long one, so get a cup of coffee and take off your shoes. Some guy on a bus once told me “humor is a healthy path to healing" after laughing at the freezing rain that almost gave me hypothermia. There might be something to the words of that crazy old man, as much as I preferred to ignore him that morning.

Landlords misbehave in other countries too!

Hello Germany.

Ask The Relic is suffering through some obnoxious repair work being done to the kitchen of the place he/she (“Relic� doesn’t exactly hint at gender) is currently dwelling with roommates in Germany.

No Tenant will respond favorably to having a kitchen renovation crew hammering and sawing about before 9am. That’s just unnecessary. Well, it might be necessary in Germany, and I’ve heard horror stories about dealing with craftspeople in Manhattan, but in the places where I collect rent it isn’t that far a stretch to schedule in-house work on a currently inhabited unit for mid-day.

Large-scale renovations are another story altogether, but Relic appears to be describing your basic “handy man� type of work. Perhaps some aesthetic touches here and there. Nothing too involved.

At least I know what I’d be called in Germany now. Hausmeister is pretty sweet sounding if you ask me. “Landlord� is cool and all, but it has some slightly negative connotations. Perhaps a nod toward a more cruel and medieval relationship between a Landlord and their Tenants. Like I have them tilling fields all day or something.

Now Hausmeister on the other hand, makes it sound like I am an actual professional of some sort! A MASTER if you will!

Yes, I realize that the normal translation of Hausemeister is the comparably less sexy “janitor�, but whatever. I’m talking PERCEPTION here. Namely, my own.

Besides, being a master of the broad and necessary janitorial crafts industry can’t be all bad, even if it is a bit bad sounding.

[my sincere apologies to any potentially offended practicers of the janitorial arts out there, much respect due]

Took a week or two off from the tales told here in order to get a bunch of personal things in order. It’s been HECTIC, but it’s been the good kind. Well, the kind that will hopefully soon be good to me.

Okay, that was cryptic. And it'll stay that way for the time being!

Speaking of hectic (and absolutely fascinating) what’s up with this (alleged? Supposed? I have no idea how to refer to this guy) Landlord up in NYC? The charges are simply flabbergasting. And I don’t mean the attempted murder or arson.

Well, maybe the arson part. But only because it’s inferred that the arson was perpetrated on his own property.

But what’s really got me confused is how this guy is potentially managing to own MULTIPLE properties in New York City (Manhattan AND Brooklyn) with a collective value well into the millions of dollars, with hundreds of documented building violations spanning more than thirty years, yet NO ONE questioned why he was only claiming $52k as income? And on top of that, they can’t seem to confirm his real name, let alone just how many properties he owns.

Why am I so worried that the curve on my depreciation schedules might be too steep on the downside? Obviously, I want to be ethical in my dealings, and I do feel compelled to do right by my tenants up to the point where it no longer makes economic sense to be involved, but seriously.

That guy’s some kind of super phantom anti-hero Landlord if it comes to pass that he’s that far off the map.

Landlords misbehave in other countries too!

Hello Canada.

Wow. Superfink is extremely upset about the current behavior of her Canadian Landlord. He’s showing her crib about to new prospective renters, even though he pushed to have her and her roommate leave so he could renovate. And he’s apparently a fan of the no-tell unit showing! He just shows up with a crew of potential renters, oh, whenever!

Actually, I (in a round-about sort of way) understand the Landlord’s desire to get some renovating done, and the need to get the current Tenants out before it begins. Two reasons:

1. The renovation project I’m looking at will require some serious effort, and will likely demand the repeated cutting off of electricity and water. Some issues, such as a bathroom re-tile, will take a couple of days to complete. There’s only one place to bathe in the unit. So how’s a Landlord supposed to get that accomplished without a severe hindrance to the current Tenant? Sure, there are ways. But those ways usually get trumped by the second issue.

2. It’s difficult to upsell a unit that’s currently inhabited, even if you do extensive remodeling/renovating. Fact is, they rented X place for X dollars a month. You deciding to take the interior and appliances to X+100 will likely not translate to X+100 dollars in new rent within the mind of the Tenant. And why should it? Seriously. Contracts simply don’t work that way, and for good reason. Long story short: it’s difficult to convince a current Tenant that a newer looking sink and a dishwasher should fetch an additional $50 in rent per month.

But a new Tenant might not mind!

However, I suspect that Superfink’s Landlord was trying to lever them out before their actual Lease was up. Which is indicative of a rather low moral character, and sorta brings us all down in the process. Even in calm realm of Canada.